she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Randomize