I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
