How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
