So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
