yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
