Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize