the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
