I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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