I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
