i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
