It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Randomize
