I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
