You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
