His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
