how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
