OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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