Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
