I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
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