To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize