Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize