Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
