There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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