Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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