Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
