I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize
