I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
