Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize