forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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