ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
