Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
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