addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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