A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
