No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
