before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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