Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I wannas sexs uuuuu
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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