i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
