it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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