Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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