I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Randomize
