"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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