He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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