So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
