I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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