I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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