ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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