i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize