He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Soap is not a condiment
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Randomize
