What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
