Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
