ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Randomize