perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
lol hangovers are for mortals.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
